Uh...hey there? [Zack is...somewhere. Outside. He's definitely near an alleyway of some sort because he just saw...

Or did he?] Hello?

[He pauses at the mouth of the alleyway, looking downright perplexed. Just then someone taps him on the shoulder and hands him a bag he had left behind.

How kind of you, Slender Man!]

How did you - ? [Oh who the hell cares? At least the guy is helpful. Zack smiles and almost claps Slender Man on the shoulder when he disappears again.]

Was it something I said? [The SOLDIER wrinkles his brow and shakes his head. He can't imagine he offended the odd guy.] Thanks!

I'll...see you around? [Maybe? Probably? Slender man is everywhere.]

So I finally found someone to scrape the nasty stuff off the side of my ship. Dunno how he's managin' it without eyes, but I ain't complaining.

[He stands up and shouts offscreen.]

When you're done, give the hull a polish.

[ The video starts with a rather startling close up of Slender Man. Simply because the Doctor is a kind, kind soul and that's totally what you want to see when you tune in to the network. Of course, maybe his whole scary-wrong feel is kind of dented by the hilariously floppy sun hat on his head - big, bright yellow flower attached to the brim.

The Doctor takes a step back, swinging the device around to his grinning face. He is personally wearing a rather fetching police constable's hat, pen caught between his teeth. He takes it out of his mouth, hums, moves like he's rocking back on his heels. ]

This is a nice curse, isn't it? It's kind of the City to provide us with a pair of helping hands. And he likes it - [ Spinning the camera back around. ] Don't you Mr. Slendy?

[ Of course, he doesn't say anything. Just stares at the device. In his sun hat. ]

Has a guy without a face been showing up at anyone else's door today? He's kinda creepy and he won't leave me alone.

[There's a knock at the door from offscreen.]

I already told you, I don't have anything for you to do.

[Ambient noise: pots clanking, drawers opening and closing, and all manner of sounds one might hear in a place where food is being prepared.]

Okay, first. If there's anyone who doesn't have anywhere to go for Thanksgiving, there'll be plenty of food at the Welcome Center: mashed potatoes and gravy, cranberry salad, stuffing, cornbread, fruit salad, pumpkin bread, pumpkin pie. No turkey unless someone else wants to pitch in there. Sorry, everyone who isn't a vegetarian!

And second, since there are a lot of people in the City who come from places that don't do Thanksgiving, it's like this. Thanksgiving is only observed in the United States and in Canada, although Canadians do it in... October, or something. Basically, Thanksgiving is built up around this myth that says that, when the pilgrims came from England to America, they had no idea how the food thing worked in the New World. Fortunately, the Native Americans were nice enough to share their knowledge and food and there was a giant feast and everyone got along.

What actually happened involves a lot more dying and a lot less feasting. And genocide. Not cheerful.

Anyway, Thanksgiving is usually celebrated with family. Everyone takes the day off work and the whole family eats a huge meal together. This is one of the only times of year when people are encouraged to slow down, look at what they have, and be thankful. Not that we shouldn't do that every day, but it's easy to forget what you have when you're not thinking about it. So--[quietly, to someone away from the mic] Oh, thank you. [And back to the mic.] Thanksgiving. Giving thanks for family, friends, and all of the good things in life.

And then, on the day after Thanksgiving when everyone's tired of everyone else, shops have sales and people forget what they're thankful for and buy as much stuff as they can.

[There's a significant pause.]

My feelings on Thanksgiving are kind of mixed.

But it's nice to hang out with your favorite people and think about what you're thankful for. Even if you have it rough and you don't think there's anything to be thankful for, just take a minute. Look at what you have. Look at the people in your life. I'm sure there's something you're grateful for.

Just as a reminder: Welcome Center. Noon until whenever. Bring food if you want, but, most importantly, bring yourself!

I have a lot of things to be thankful for this year. For a while I kind of didn't think I would so much, but then I remembered just how lucky I am to have good friends and a little house I love and my greenhouse at the Library and just the Library itself, 'cause it really likes me and gosh, oh so many things!

Neil and Arthur and Merlin and Charlie and Saya and oh gosh, I can't start listing all of them 'cause I'll forget people and really you're all so wonderful!


[Private to Arthur]

Arthur, I'm especially thankful for you, but I was kind of shy to say just how much in front of everyone and besides it should just be between us, right? But anyway, I'm really really so glad you're you and that you like being with me.

[Slenderman sobbing.]
NO BIRD FOR FEAST?!  YOU LET BIRD RUN AWAY?!
[Sobbing grows in volume.]
YOU MUCH NO HELP!!
[Somebody's crying a river.]
YOU VILLAGE IDIOT!!
[The dam's burst. Mass flooding.]

So, dictionaries keep finding their way into my hands, which I took as a sign. But look at what I've found:

EAMES
Pronunciation (US): i:mz
• EAMES (noun)
1. United States designer noted for an innovative series of chairs (1907-1978)
Familiarity information: EAMES used as a noun is very rare.
Instance hypernyms:
decorator; designer; house decorator; interior decorator; interior designer; room decorator (a person who specializes in designing architectural interiors and their furnishings)

Legitimate entry in a dictionary, and all! However, I want to submit a different meaning, considering my vast, thorough research into the matter:

EAMES [i:mz]
adj. Eamesier, Eamesiest

1. Said of a surly, yet (relatively) stylish, rake with a tendency to get in the good graces of anyone despite all instincts warning towards the contrary. 2. A precarious mix of cynicism, imagination and smarminess. 3. Said of a person with a disposition towards changing their mood from lots of fun to the world is ending and everything is a trap in under two comments.

I propose we push this forward as a City-wide accepted definition. All in favour, say-or-type aye.

[ooc; That first definition is real, I shit you not. (He had it coming.)]