13 February 2013 @ 08:27 am
[Crowley has found himself a canal-side seat at a cafe and is watching the passers-by with no small interest. Just under him, a small flotilla of ducks has gathered, and occasionally he tosses one a bit of biscuit. Usually they don't even sink, he must be in a good mood.

As it turns out, his attention seems much more focused on the people who pass by and particularly those who navigate around a corner by his table. Why? Because for some reason that particular corner seems to be very slippery.

That's the fourth citizen to tumble into the canal this morning and he's recording it all for posterity: the initial slip, the flailing arms grasping for something to arrest the fall, the teetering right at the brink over the canal's murky water, and finally, the resoundingly satisfying splash followed by the sound of a single demon's sardonic applause.]

Well done, you.

[He adjusts his camera to provide a slow motion replay of the entire tumble before he sets it down to record the next victim poor soul.]

[ooc: come take a tumble or have lunch with Crowley or berate him for his schadenfreude and poor taste in pranks?]
27 January 2013 @ 02:18 pm
Good little flower
Bloom for old Uncle Crowley
And you get to live

[ooc: Delivering a haiku-encouragement to his plants. All replies will be haikus.]
30 December 2012 @ 01:43 pm
[Crowley doesn't catch on to what's happening at first. You'd be surprised how much of his day involves not being demon-y at all. He gets up in the morning, puts on his sunglasses and his clothes, combs his hair, threatens his plants, and heads out to terrorize his favorite barista.

Even that goes just as he expects right up to the moment when he reaches into his pocket for some coins to pay for his drink and none appear.

Standing in line with no way to pay for his drink, his favorite barista wastes no time in kicking him out onto the street sans miracles, money, or recourse.

It isn't until he lowers his sunglasses to look at himself in the coffee shop's window that he sees normal human eyes looking back at him.]


[ooc: Crowley's been average Joe'd. Feel free to harass the hell out of him as he hurries home.]
27 November 2012 @ 11:15 pm
He's... everywhere. I saw a movie recently that was like this - some actor walked through a door in his own head and came out in a world where everyone had his face. It's like that, only it's not that actor, it's this horse-faced chap. [He turns his camera around to show the covey of Cages in the square.]

It's brilliant.

Aziraphale, how's your face?
26 October 2012 @ 08:55 am
It's a picture of a candy apple )

[Crowley's eating a caramel apple with great enjoyment.]

Just what the doctor ordered. I just got back from the circus and it's both brilliant and binge-inspiring. No, really. That's the freakiest freak show I've seen outside of... well, best not to dwell on that.

Still, I think I might go back later to see what's been added. Surely it's no surprise to anyone that the week before Halloween would get weird around here?
09 October 2012 @ 12:07 pm
[Funny thing - Crowley has always quite liked Aziraphale, whether he admits it or not (or not) and this morning when he woke up, all he wanted to do was see what it was like to live like his roommate for a while. Call it a lark.

And when you're a demon with full control over your appearance? Well, let's just say that Crowley's plants are terribly confused.

The problem is, for all his many years of hanging out with Aziraphale and observing him, he just doesn't have the knack for being him.]

Good morning, dears. How are we feeling today. I feel the need to get a good thwart on and wear lots of tartan.

Next I think I'll open a bookstore and never sell anything.

Right, erm. I mean, I think I'll go feed the ducks.

[You can catch Crowleyphale out feeding ducks, bestowing random unneeded blessings, or drinking far too much tea (spiked) anywhere in the City or just ping him at home.]
28 September 2012 @ 11:11 am
[Crowley looks almost frenetically cheerful. Who knows what expression is hiding behind his sunglasses (desperation) but his smile is wide and unwavering.]

Come now, it's the traditional day after a curse port-mortem in which we all take comfort in the fact that what happens on a curse day stays on a curse day.


[ooc: Crowley was cursed yesterday and signed his prenup. With Hatter.]
Current Mood: freaked out
18 September 2012 @ 05:05 pm
I caused the
(pst, it was easy)
and all I got was
this lousy-tshirt

image behind the cut )
08 September 2012 @ 11:27 am
[There is a white bed in a white room covered in white sheets and a white blanket. It's very stark and probably decorated by someone whose present day happens to be sometime in the 90s. There are lumps under the uninterrupted white and some of the lumps start to stir.

First one arm stretches out in the start of a morning (afternoon) stretch that is so luxuriant it could hit at least two of the seven deadly sins without effort, but then another arm stretches out from under the blankets and everything freezes.

There's a handcuff on that arm.

The arm shakes experimentally - the only movement on the screen - and another arm is revealed on the other side of the handcuff. It shakes along with the experimental shake.

Then Crowley is throwing off his sheets and sitting up to stare with wide yellow eyes at the angel in his bed.]

Dulcie? What the Hell? I wasn't that drunk last night!
19 August 2012 @ 09:29 am
[Presented without context, a scene from somewhere in Xanadu.]


Video clip of a flying snake behind the cut )
10 August 2012 @ 09:53 pm
What are you gawking at? Never seen a naked person before?

Look, can you car--

[Someone, presumably whomever Crowley's speaking to, makes an unintelligible comment and starts to laugh until the laugh is cut off, turning to a strangled scream that recedes as though the screamer is running very far away, very fast.]


[Crowley is naked, and per canon, angels (which Crowley started out as, tyvm) are "sexless unless they really want to make an effort." He's not making the effort, and he has acquired the turntable he was so... ahem... excited by, so he's unwilling to turn into a snake and leave it behind. Naked, Ken doll!Crowley at your service for action, voice, or video that the City will happily turn on at inconvenient moments.]
09 August 2012 @ 09:35 pm
Atop the HRS M3 sits the massive Balance turntable, whose vestigial ovoid plinth is CNC-machined from a single piece of 40mm-thick Dural, the hardest aluminum available, according to the designer, Helmut Brinkmann. The oversized platter, 3ΒΌ" tall and weighing 44 lbs, is made of an aluminum-lead-copper alloy said to achieve extremely effective damping. The platter surface is a plate of elastomer-bonded crystal glass. An integral record clamp screws into the spindle. Mechanical energy created at the stylus/groove interface drains down from the record to the platter surface, then into the platter itself, where the derived mechanical impedances of the various materials prevent it from flowing back up to the vinyl. A massive, raised, round armboard platform of Dural, also attached to the plinth, features a stainless-steel ring whose only function is to look good.

[There's an extended, snakelike hiss, then Crowley stops reading and muses.]

Oh yes, you will be mine.
06 August 2012 @ 03:03 pm
[His communicator turns on by itself, showing a man's back as he leans to examine himself in a white-framed mirror hung on a stark white wall in a room that looks to be white on white on white on chrome broken only by some remarkably lush houseplants.

From behind, his hair is a frizzed out mass that he's trying to smooth down to the sound of frequent crackles and zaps.]

Not cool. Looks like a good day for a nap.

[Turning away, he spots the blinking red light on his communicator and brushes down his hair, resulting in visible crackles of static in its frizz before he crosses the room and cuts the video, leaving just the audio.]

You can try to take the mickey if you want, but I won't be listening.
27 July 2012 @ 06:41 pm
[Crowley is sitting outside, based on the background in the video, probably at a sidewalk cafe that's closed for the unseasonable weather. Occasionally a small snow-slide passes behind him - it's possible he's sitting under an umbrella. He's holding a mug with steam drifting up and takes a sip that doesn't fog the sunglasses he still has sitting on his face despite the obvious lack of sun.]

See, now this is what I mean. Blizzards in July. I suppose they aren't so interesting if you're accustomed to living in the southern hemisphere, but I've always been partial to Europe, which makes this a welcome novelty.

Indulge my curiosity, since I've been away a few years - what curses have you experienced in your time in the City? Which ones did you enjoy and which did you hate?

[ooc: He's just collecting information to keep from repeating the deities' efforts if he decides to start messing with people/the City.]
23 July 2012 @ 04:33 pm
[The camera swings around wildly, not really being pointed at anything so much as held in someone's hand while he orients himself.

And apparently climbs out of the fountain.]

Oh you have got to be--

I was just--

This is--

Fine I didn't want to deal with the apocalypse anyway.

[The camera swings around to give a view of a pair of snakeskin shoes before it's turned to point at a completely dry man in dark sunglasses.]

Hello, City, it's Uncle Crowley. I'm back.

Mr. Phale? Are you there?