☤ 004

[mintjulep]

If you're going to have sex with an alien species, make sure to talk to your doctor first. Chances are they secrete pheromones that will alter your way of thinking, secrete oils that will give you an allergic reaction, have spines attached to their genitals, or have suckers on their tentacles. If that doesn't put you off the experience, we'd at least like to make sure we've vaccinated you against whatever they might be carrying -- which we can do in 2258, at least where I come from. We'd also like to get a look at your partner, especially if it's a species we don't know much about. That'll make our job easier later on.

Remember that a lot of species, even humanoid ones, are probably stronger than you. Vulcans, Romulans, and Klingons all have two legs and two arms, but they can break you in half. Hell, in Klingon society, breaking a clavicle on the wedding night is considered a blessing. A lot of species may think that you having sex with them is a proposal of marriage, too; make sure you know your alien cultures before you stick it in, because if they're part of the Federation, it might be legally binding.

Comments

[iwasherefirst]

[Rose can not help the giggling she's doing.]

There lotsa doctors that know 'bout aliens?

[mintjulep]

There are back where I'm from.

voice;

[duplicities]

Interesting.

[ WHAT ELSE IS SHE SUPPOSED TO SAY. ]

[mintjulep]

Which part?

[valentineluke]

Looking to set up a practice in the Underground?

[mintjulep]

There a lot of nonhumans who need medical attention down there?

[designedtoparty]

Now there's a marriage ceremony I wouldn't mind taking part in. Is divorce like mutual masturbation or something?

[mintjulep]

Probably closer to fighting to the death, if you do it through their culture. If it's Federation standard, though, it's just some paperwork and maybe a lawyer or two.

[leathered]

You must be a doctor. Good information.

[mintjulep]

I am. CMO on a starship.

[likeboudica]

Is it very common for-- such things to happen?

[mintjulep]

Back home? Yeah, there's a fair amount of it.

[nohometown]

You have extensive knowledge of exobiology?

[Sephiroth doesn't have any personal investment in the thought of having sex with aliens, although the comparative biology involved is interesting. On his world, they haven't encountered any alien races (that he knows of), and he finds the idea intriguing.]

I'd be interested in learning more on the subject, if you wouldn't mind discussing the different species you're familiar with and your experiences with them.

[mintjulep]

It's needed, for my job.

[ Would he mind? No. Not really. But... ]

There are a lot of them.

[wouldnotkindly]

Spines...on their... Really?

[Here, doctor, this horrified look is just for you.]

[mintjulep]

Really.

It doesn't stop everyone.

[likeabreath]

Don't forget some aliens use orgasmic energy as a food source and end up immolating their partners.

[mintjulep]

Others just use their partners as a food source.

a u d i o ][

[skylight]

What's a Vull Can?

[ the important questions. sora asks them. cough. ]

[mintjulep]

In this context, a species of alien lifeforms. Green blood, pointed ears, obsessed with logic.

[pinkeffinprofessional]

Fuck.

[mintjulep]

Yeah, that's the idea.

[errandry]

... this would be wwway cooler if it were about something else.

[mintjulep]

I can talk about their blood color, if you'd like.

[bedsidemanners]

Really, your list of examples would make a xenophobe out of anyone.

[mintjulep]

My apologies.

[iwatchtjhooker]

Uh...

Okay passing over the whole aliens thing, and also the fact everyone's gone crazy, why is it chances are sex with them is gonna be a bad thing? I men, the universe can't be that cruel, can it?

[Sam thinks about that a moment. And remembers his life.]

You know what? Forget I asked.

[OOC: now I really want to app Kirk...]

[mintjulep]

Do you really want to stick your dick into someone that has spines in her vagina? Because the spines might not all stay in there when you pull it back out again.

((ooc: all of the Trek muses!))

(video.)

[godofabs]

[he doesn't get it...]

[mintjulep]

[ SIGH. ]

You look confused.

Video;

[lovelydragoon]

[A decently long pause before she asks,] You're human, aren't you?

[mintjulep]

Last time I checked.