☤ 004

[mintjulep]

If you're going to have sex with an alien species, make sure to talk to your doctor first. Chances are they secrete pheromones that will alter your way of thinking, secrete oils that will give you an allergic reaction, have spines attached to their genitals, or have suckers on their tentacles. If that doesn't put you off the experience, we'd at least like to make sure we've vaccinated you against whatever they might be carrying -- which we can do in 2258, at least where I come from. We'd also like to get a look at your partner, especially if it's a species we don't know much about. That'll make our job easier later on.

Remember that a lot of species, even humanoid ones, are probably stronger than you. Vulcans, Romulans, and Klingons all have two legs and two arms, but they can break you in half. Hell, in Klingon society, breaking a clavicle on the wedding night is considered a blessing. A lot of species may think that you having sex with them is a proposal of marriage, too; make sure you know your alien cultures before you stick it in, because if they're part of the Federation, it might be legally binding.

Comments

[mintjulep]

Which part?

[duplicities]

All of it.

[mintjulep]

Happy to be of service.

[duplicities]

Deal with these things all the time, do you?

[mintjulep]

Yeah, actually. Being a doctor in Starfleet means you see all sorts of things.

[duplicities]

The future holds strange and mysterious things, does it?

[mintjulep]

Mostly strange. Space holds them both.

[duplicities]

Nice to have confirmation of that finally.

[mintjulep]

[ Snort. ]

Vulcan made contact in 2063, if that helps.

[duplicities]

Fifty years off, unfortunately. I'll have to somehow live with the anticipation.

[mintjulep]

195 years ago for me.

[duplicities]

You've quite the jump on me.

[mintjulep]

Seems like I've got quite a jump on most people here. The average seems to be around the 2000s.

[duplicities]

You're just lucky, it seems.

[mintjulep]

Guess so. Learning how to use your damn medieval medical tools is a pain in the ass, though.

[duplicities]

They aren't midieval.

[mintjulep]

They might as well be. Y'all still use stitches.

[duplicities]

And I suppose you have something better?

[mintjulep]

As a matter of fact, I do. A dermal regenerator.

[duplicities]

I'll get to work in developing one.

[mintjulep]

I brought one with.

[duplicities]

How lucky.

And you've been making use of it?

[mintjulep]

When I can, though mostly I've been working out how to use technology from around 2012 instead, since it's more prevalent.

[duplicities]

I'd assume it would be easier to use, would it not?

[mintjulep]

Technology 250 years old? Not particularly.

It's large, clunky. Has a harder time picking things up and is less precise. When you're used to being able to speak to your computer, figuring out how to use... what is it, Windows? is a damn pain in the ass.