VII. [Video]

[godlyendowment]

[Hercules is shirtless, even sans his normal sash and headgear. He appears to be toweling his hair dry, and the video feed is getting a rather nice shot of his wet and glistening abs. Luckily, that is as low as the feed goes, too. After a moment, Hercules pauses, looking directly into the screen.]

Oh, sorry there, I must have bumped it!

[He laughs, not a bit self-conscious or even embarassed.]

I suppose... You're welcome, ladies.

Comments

[godlyendowment]

Heroic things!

[itsjustafruit]

[Long on muscle short on brains, eh?]

Such as?

[godlyendowment]

Punching bad guys?

[itsjustafruit]

You find many of those around here?

[godlyendowment]

I work as a bouncer at a vampire bar for money. So yes.

[itsjustafruit]

That doesn't sound very heroic, consorting with creatures of darkness.

[godlyendowment]

Ahhh, but I make sure they don't do dark things.

[itsjustafruit]

It's in their nature to do dark things. Trust me, I know what I'm talking about.

[godlyendowment]

And what makes you such an expert?

[itsjustafruit]

Long years of observation. I even fund the Witchfinder Army back home.

[godlyendowment]

I don't know what that is, friend. Is it a true army, or a fanclub of somesort?

[itsjustafruit]

It's a real army.

For some reason it attracts a lot of Smiths and Smythes, but it's an army.

[godlyendowment]

An army for what purpose? I am wary of private armies, they always end badly.

[itsjustafruit]

Do you think you can break down the word Witchfinder and work it out for yourself?

[godlyendowment]

And what do they do after they find them?

[Herc's patience is wearing a little thin after that crack.]

[itsjustafruit]

I haven't paid attention in a while - pins and dunking, bonfires are traditional, but it can be so hard to get the necessary permits.

[Score!]

[godlyendowment]

Well it seems I've found another bad guy to punch, then.

[itsjustafruit]

And now the truth comes out, you're just a bully.

[godlyendowment]

A bully attacks the innocent. You are not.

[itsjustafruit]

What have I done to a single innocent in this city?

[godlyendowment]

Well if you encourage violence against innocent witches, that is enough to make you a villain in my book.

[itsjustafruit]

By definition witches aren't innocent where I'm from. Don't be so ethnocentric.

[He wants to take credit for that phrase, but it belongs to freshman anthro students.]

[godlyendowment]

...I don't know what that means.

[itsjustafruit]

It means you don't get to apply your morals to people who weren't raised with them.

[godlyendowment]

I'm pretty sure that's what morals are for.