poly_chromatic | Voice; filtered from residents of Diva's estate

Entry tags:

blood plus - saya otonashi

Voice; filtered from residents of Diva's estate

[There's a moment of dead air before Saya's thin voice is heard.]

I just want to say to everyone who helped me when I first got here, and everyone who's been friends with me since then, that I don't know what I would have done without you. Thank you for everything.

...I thought I should say that. Just -- in case.

((OOC: action is fine for housemates))

[Deity filter]

I would like to make a trade, please. I want my memories from before my arrival here. [She's recovered a bare few, but mostly her life before the City is flashes of intuition, maddeningly elusive.]

[She's all ready to say what she's willing to give up. She should have said it right there, in that open air. Just another second, and she'll be able to get it out.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

So straightforward. Such a declaration of intent. I rather like it.

We can restore those memories.

What do you offer?

I thought that was how it worked. [SHE IS A NEWB SHHH]

I'm offering... [just say it.] The memories of the person most important to me. Setsuna Mudou.

It's how it's supposed to work. We get a lot of dancing around most of the time.

"Hey, I want to trade. Can you do that?"

Yes.

"Hey, I heard you guys do trades. Is that true?"

Yes.

"So, I want to trade with you."

Get on with it.

I should follow my own advice here, shouldn't I?

How precious, how valuable these memories. Equality in the exchange, one for the other, a matched pair.

I think we can do this. I wonder what he will think, of course. But that's speculation on my part.

Yes. I can accept this. I'll take those memories and return your others.

[ooc: So! As per your request, yup! In exchange for her memories of Setsuna, she'll have her canon memories restored. Is this a permanent trade? Just so's I know, you know?]

[...The rambling makes this oddly surreal, though it does have the benefit of shaking her out of her melancholy. For the moment.]

Okay. Good. What do I have to... do?

((OOC: yep, permanent memory loss! Because I hate happiness.))

It's a simple procedure. First and foremost, come by the offices to sign the necessary paperwork. We'll proceed from there.

[ooc: LMAO. Okay, just checking. And, with that, please feel free to have the trade go into effect any time hereafter!]

The offices. All right.

...Thank you. [She's well aware that this isn't a chance she'd get anywhere else.]

((OOC: Would she experience any symptoms of having her entire life rearranged inside her skull? Or can I just make up the severity of it?))

You're more than welcome, of course.

I wonder if I even ought to say that.

[ooc: That's pretty much up to you! She could feel physical symptoms, if you'd like, like dizziness or nausea or poor balance or ringing in her ears or anything else you like. Or she could feel more psychological symptoms, like a sense of having forgotten something but being unable to remember what it was, or Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicle style "memories with missing pieces" where she remembers everything about a situation but Setsuna and thinks something is wrong, &c. It's up to you what you'd like to do with it. Have fun!]

[She's already told him a little bit about what she planned to do before, but he's still a little taken aback hearing the post.]

Saya.... [Long pause.] Take care.

[Unfortunately, she's changed her mind since then. Which is why there's a very long stretch of static instead of an answer.]

[She can't manage to hang up, but she can't say anything either.]

If you're planning to do what I think you are [he's only thinking deity trade], just be careful.

[Saya swallows against her dry throat. Then again. Her voice isn't working.]

[Finally she just forces a few words out, not really knowing what they'll be.]

...I'm sorry.

[And then the line goes dead.]

Why do I get the feeling something's wrong?

A lot of things are wrong. I'm going to try and fix it but... I don't know what will happen.

What are you going to do? [Why is she afraid it's something foolish?]

[ At the door of Saya's room, she'll be alerted to the sharp rap of knuckles. Characteristically, there's a slight scowl on Karl's face. Uncharacteristically, he isn't empty-handed -- there's a tray of hot soup in his hold. ]

[ A bribe, of sorts, to get her to open the door. ]

Planning to mope in there for eternity?

[A snappish what do you care? was on her lips until she sees the soup and aborts at the last moment. Instead, she gets off her bed and moves to the closet for something better to wear. If Karl wants to watch her change, fine.]

No. I'm on my way out.

[...But that soup does smell good, so] What's that?

Where are you going? [ It slips from his lips without forethought. (Much like everything else does.) His expression is more stern than curious. He doesn't avert his eyes; he's long since abandoned the concept of physical modesty, and there isn't much of it to begin with in this household. ]

[ Besides. There's a thrill in watching her that skates between prurient and aesthetic. ]

[ He proffers the tray, a fragrant curl of steam rising from the bowl. ] Goose soup. [ Goose blood soup, actually. But. Details. ]

[Dress halfway overhead, she pauses. But then, why not let him know? It won't be a secret soon enough.] I traded with the deities for my memories.

[She eyes that soup for a second before retuning to her dressing. Maybe one bite before she goes to handle the paperwork. It's not like she's stalling.]

[ I traded with the deities for my memories. The sentence touches him and falls to the ground, a poorly-sailed paper plane. His fingers tighten a fraction around the tray. But he doesn't let it rattle; he sets it on the dresser with a sharp click. ]

Without telling anyone? [ There's a heated edge of accusation there. But overlaying it is something almost plaintive. Despairing. ]

[ (Why is it despairing?) ]

[ (She'll be her true self soon. All the missing pieces aligned. He should be overjoyed.) ]

[ (He's not.) ]

[Her dress is tugged into place with more fuss than is strictly necessary. She has no understanding of what's behind that question, but feels like she should.]

It wasn't a secret.

[Rather than ask what would probably be a question stupid enough to get her chortled at, she wanders over and dips a finger into the soup to taste it. A glance up at Karl probably reveals her question even after all the shadowboxing: isn't that what you wanted?]

[ He leans against the wall, just beyond the circle of heat she always gives off. His expression is brittle; his gaze slips from hers, and from the question telegraphed and bright and distinct in her eyes. ]

[ Isn't it what I wanted? ]

[ He'd agree that it was, except now that it's come to pass, there's no towering joy. No triumph. Just a crushing sense of anticlimax, like a song you've gotten used to, gotten fond of, has been cut short before the big finish. There's a pause, then two, before he licks his lips and asks, ]

How fast will the effects be? Will your memories return in a day? All at once?

It's good. [The soup, that is. Which is her way of saying it's appreciated. Really, he's not so bad sometimes -- or maybe that's just the loss of everything good in her life talking? But obsessive and crazy as Karl is, what he thinks is actually relevant to Saya.]

I don't know. I was going to do the paperwork now. I guess it's something we work out then.

[Is he going to ask what she traded? Would he even care about what she's losing? He'd probably be thrilled.]

[ The remark, even if in Karl's mind, is aimed at the soup, not him, gets a flicker of a smile. But it's too tepid to be anything but mechanical; none of that feral swagger. His mind is too busy whirling like a camera on a pivot. Imagining how events will progress after her memories are restored to her, with the grim inevitability of a dam whose surface is pitted in fissures -- a flood of devastation ready to break loose at any moment. ]

[ What's wrong with me? ]

[ He tries to shake the stupefaction off. To meet her gaze levelly. ] What did you offer in exchange? A limb? More valuable memories?

[He's not acting right. At least, not as she'd thought. Maybe she'd overestimated her importance in this -- household.]

[It's that rather than the question that throws her off-balance, enough to answer with perfect honesty because she has no mind for verbal heel-turns. And it's another thing she won't be able to hide.] I'm giving them my memories of Setsuna.

Permanently. [This time when she glances Karl's way, it's not for approval. Difficult to tell what exactly it is, but at least it's clear what it's not.]

[ Setsuna. Karl tries to ignore the implication of this, that her memories of Setsuna were as cherished -- as worth their weight in gold -- as the ones she's bargained back from the Deities. If he had a pulse, his heart would be rising up in his chest like a sea-monster through water, rushing past suspicion and dread and jealousy and anger to pop up high into the clear bright realm of relief. ]

[ But there's none of that. All he feels is still and heavy. Leadweight. ]

[ He's glad the Cherub is out of her mind. Quite literally erased. And in return she'll receive her memories -- what could be more satisfying than that? It's a win-win. And it should be the easiest thing there is, to say that to her. To smile his vicious victorious smile. ]

[ Except all it seems like it the end of a golden era. It's not something he can explain to Saya. Not something he can explain to himself. ]

[ Instead of speaking, instead of meeting her eyes, he swoops out of the room. Not on foot, but at Chiropteran speed -- leaving a whoosh of wind, and the door flapping in his wake. ]

Wanted to check with you whether I should consider Carla a resident, or not. Either way is fine, I just wanted to make sure I was on the right side of the filter!

I'm fine with however you want to go on this, really!

Strictly from Saya's IC point of view at this moment, she would have no reason to consider Carla a resident since they haven't run into each other there. (Saya is reclusive and tends to self-isolate so I tend to assume that she is off in her own little bratty Saya-focused world of ultimate martyrdom and hasn't a clue about what Carla, or anyone else, is up to in the house. Ain't she a special snowflake?)

But if you prefer to handwave that they ran into each other at the house so Saya would consider her a resident, that's completely good with me and Carla is entirely welcome to tag with an action-y thing if you wish! Saya is on her way out to do Deity paperwork and common areas will have to first be stalked through. XD

You're not very self-sufficient.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Voice; filtered from residents of Diva's estate

|| Deity Filter ||

|| Deity Filter ||

|| Deity Filter ||

|| Deity Filter ||

|| Deity Filter ||

|| Deity Filter ||

|| Deity Filter ||

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

voice; private

voice; private

Re: voice; private

action <3

....awww!

x3

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

ooc;

ooc;

voice; //and then vee was also super late