1st Opportunity :: Video

[recognize_an_opportunity]

[The feed clicks on, first showing Meyer's shoes, then panning up, showing a sensible brown suit, a crisp tie, and a far too serious expression for someone as young as this man appears to be.]

The way I see it, I've been kidnapped.

[He doesn't sound particularly perturbed about it.]

Perhaps this is something that is better discussed in person. I'm certainly willing and able to make a generous offer in exchange for my freedom, if my captors are reasonable men. If not, I'm afraid we'll have to go about this a different way.

[There's a long pause.]

I would appreciate a quick response to my inquiry. I think it'll be better for all of us if this goes as painlessly as possible.

Comments

[pigtailsbutterflyknives]

Yep! Keep that in mind and you'll do great here.

[recognize_an_opportunity]

Should I ask when you're from, or will that confuse me more?

[pigtailsbutterflyknives]

Get settled first.

[recognize_an_opportunity]

Then I'll need housing, food, and employment opportunities.

[pigtailsbutterflyknives]

Pick an apartment building. Snoop around until you find an empty apartment. Move in.

When you've had time to adjust, address the network again and find a job.

[recognize_an_opportunity]

That sounds straightforward enough.

[pigtailsbutterflyknives]

Yup! That's the easy part.

So, including what I told you, what all have you heard so far? In case I missed anything.

[recognize_an_opportunity]

There was something mentioned about "curses".

[pigtailsbutterflyknives]

That's the hard part. They're random. Sometimes flat pout fucking stupid. And sometimes they're dangerous. There were angry cows a few days ago that were runnin' all over the place.

[recognize_an_opportunity]

I think I prefer flat out fucking stupid to dangerous. Angry cows sounds like an unfortunate amalgamation of both.

[pigtailsbutterflyknives]

Pretty much. But they turned to dairy products afterward. Which...okay, stupid. But it saves me on grocery shopping.

[recognize_an_opportunity]

This all sounds highly implausible.

[pigtailsbutterflyknives]

And yet here you are in the middle of a pocket dimension talking to a girl who isn't from the same year as you.

[recognize_an_opportunity]

[A laugh.]

You're right. It's all implausible, but I have no choice but to accept it.