( audio o7 )

[verylast]

-- Of course it's in there, you're clearly not looking hard enough.

[ There's a rustle, and then another voice muttering something that really doesn't bear repeating, thank you very much, Master, before the Doctor's voice filters in again. ]

Oh fine, here let me look, I know my way around better than you do and -.

Why did the door just close? [ A longer pause. ] And why won't it open?

Comments

[worstretconever]

[Groan.] That's still hours away. I'll probably end up killing you by then.

[verylast]

[ Sigh. More complicated string structures. ]

Even you must be getting bored of threatening me by now.

[worstretconever]

I've got to keep myself entertained somehow, and it's either threatening to kill you or playing the recorder that was in that fur coat.

[verylast]

Oh.

[ Maybe he still knows Greensleeves. ]

[worstretconever]

[...but the Master goes for a third option and turns back to the book again. They actually sit in silence for several minutes.]

Are you starting to feel a little peckish?

[verylast]

[ STARTLED BAMBI EYES. ]

I - no.

[ Don't eat him. ]

[worstretconever]

I am. [GRIIIIIIN.]

[verylast]

Behave.

[worstretconever]

[The Master leans over and bites the Doctor on the side of his neck - not hard enough to break the skin, but definitely hard enough that there'll be a mark there tomorrow.]

[verylast]

[ When he flails he hits his hand off the shelf above them and swats at him. ]

Stop. [ :| ]

[worstretconever]

[Liiiiiiiicking the Doctor's neck now.] Mmmm, delicious.

[verylast]

[ COMPLETELY FLUSTERED. ]

Can you just at least pretend to be normal?

[worstretconever]

[Nibblenibblenibblenibble, like a bunny rabbit gnawing on the Doctor's neck.]

Would you ever pretend to be normal?

[verylast]

[ Trying to wriggle free like - well, a time lord being nibbled. ]

I am completely normal.

[worstretconever]

[He stops nibbling - and also licking and biting - but now he's just sort of leaning against the Doctor, not bothering to move his face out of his neck, so his lips brush his skin when he speaks.

...stupid Rani had to go and be sort of half-right.]

You're such a liar.

[verylast]

[ Indulgently, and almost a smidgen fond. ]

I stretch the truth a tad every now and again. [ The Master's very distracting - sometimes they're mortal enemies, sometimes they're ... something closer to soulmates than either of them are every comfortable with. The lines blur. ]

[worstretconever]

[The Master's telling himself that this is just something he's doing to amuse himself - because watching the Doctor flail awkwardly is extremely amusing. He shifts until his body covers the Doctor's, scraping his teeth over his neck again.

Most people would be kissing right about now, but that's not something the Master wants to do - kissing might actually imply a level of fondness that biting him definitely doesn't have. He nips him just below his ear.]

You wouldn't want to be normal, anyway.

[verylast]

[ With a quiet discontent noise because this is all very strange. ]

I'm older, I might.

[worstretconever]

[He tilts his head to look up at the Doctor then, studying his face for a long moment.]

No, you couldn't.

[verylast]

[ Something tugs painfully in his chest as he glances at him. ]

It's been a long time, I'm tired.

[worstretconever]

[The Master huffs irritably before dropping his head to rest his chin on the Doctor's shoulder. If they were anybody else, this could almost be considered cuddling.]

You're a sentimental old fool. And I'm definitely moving back into a cardboard box.

[Right after he takes the longest cold shower in the history of the universe.]

[verylast]

No you're not.

[ You saved me.

He wants to do the same now. ] You hate living out there. You miss being the old you.

[worstretconever]

[The Master rolls his eyes, even if the Doctor can't see him.] Did you actually believe that I was still eating people? I mean, really? I would've died by now if my energy levels weren't stabilised.

[verylast]

[ ... ]

Point. I thought perhaps it was the City's influence. [ Fidgeting slightly. ]

[worstretconever]

[For some weird reason, the Master seems content to stay right where he is. Maybe it's because he likes making the Doctor feel awkward.]

And I would've zapped you by now if I could have.