poly_chromatic | 002 ✖ VIDEO

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misfits - nathan young

002 ✖ VIDEO

[Now, would Nathan be left out on a curse like today? Of course not. He doesn't seem as bothered by his t-shirt as some citizens, not even bothering to zip up his hoodie to try and hide the message.

I SHAT MYSELF IN MY COFFIN AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY T-SHIRT

He stretches out the material so it can be read clearly, then lets it go.]

Okay, so how many of you can spend days in a coffin without either taking a shit or having your bowels explode everywhere? I bet even the deities couldn't hold it that long.

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So... why the fuck were you in a coffin in the first place?

Because my friends are a bunch of wankers. It's not like I'd be in there by choice.

They made you go in a coffin? Your friends are fucked.

Well, I may have been a little bit dead at the time, but if they'd just held on to my body for a couple of days it would never have happened.

You were... dead?

[A pause.]

You, uh, don't seem dead now.

Was it a nice coffin?

Ah: the part no one talks about. How long were you down there?

Probably because I'm not.

If you like cramped, underground places that smell like one of the cleaner bus station toilets, sure.

What were you doing in one? Had a fit of sudden death?

How would I know? My iPod only lasted a few hours.

Why so keen on sudden death? I always thought you'd be more the type to get off on the slow, painful sort of deaths.

Simply asking.

I'm not the one who landed you in the coffin, after all.

Long enough to die again?

Uh. Ew.

So you... came back from the dead?

Kinda hard to declare when one coffin's supposed to hold you forever. How'd you get buried, anyway?

Obviously.

How long have you been here? This place is practically crawling with immortals.

But you are the one trying to get material you can wank over later.

Not that I know of. Guess there was a lot of oxygen in that coffin.

It's not like I could help it. I wasn't even alive when it happened.

Apparently no one thought to check my pulse. Free health care really isn't all that it's cracked up to be.

I guess so. So how did you get out?

Uh... I got here yesterday.

That's a flattering impression to make.

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