][ grab-bag [ blog entry #528 ]

[dropkick]

Boss says: I have to go to [INSERT FAR-AWAY CITY - not far-away as in the next border, far-away like 14 hours on a plane that might have to drop him off at the 10 hour point elsewhere with a layover of 5 hours - which contract forbids me from naming].
I say: When?
Boss says: Today.

This asshole. I need a new job.

ETA, another fine example of why that's true:

YOU HAVE 491 NEW EMAILS.

Dear assistant,
I am an up and coming--

No.

Dear assistant,
We wrote you a week ago about--

No.

Dear assistant,
This is something you won't want to--

Yeah no I really don't.

Dear assistant,
About those photos posted online of you and Mr-


I NEED A NEW JOB.

ETA #2 why am I still awake:

Here's a tip for anyone with a PA under them: don't be an asshole, and if it's just a biological necessity for you to be one then don't get a PA. No one deserves you but you.

And then a tip for the people who want to have their projects picked up by my boss (if you don't know who he is already then take that as a sign on its own):

DON'T BOTHER.

Or...what is it in the movies? Don't have your people call our people - Person.

Instead I suggest grabbing the nearest OED and looking up UNLIKELY then copying it down by hand 500 times. In cursive. If you still want to contact him by then, please, by all means.

Go for it.



[ooc: :c devil wears prada oh mr fischer oh! 8X replies can be labeled ANON in subject if you want him to not know who's replying to his ~blog-post~ lmffflsf;k ]

Comments

[signatures]

I thought the general point of an assistant was to do their job and accomplish the needs of their employer, to be honest. If you don't want to do your job, why continue to be employed?

But I thought you worked at the casino?

[ And why are you using coloured font... ]

[dropkick]

It's easier than being unemployed.

Casino? What gave you that idea?

[signatures]

Then hopefully your employer won't find this gem and link it to you.

Due to your having been working at the casino for some time now.

[dropkick]

I named no names. Either way, I'd think of something.

But I don't have two jobs. Yet.

[signatures]

What's your name?

[dropkick]

I left my name out for a reason.

[ MOSTLY in that he knows Fischer will already know it's him and has for 'years' to his mind, but you know. ]

[signatures]

So private message me it.

private; unhackable ::

[dropkick]

Why do you want to know?

private; unhackable ::

[signatures]

Because that blog post has a high number but I've never seen them before.

private; unhackable ::

[dropkick]

...that's a weird reason to want a PA'S name.

Is there a specific name you're looking for?

private; unhackable ::

[signatures]

Arthur Wright.

private; unhackable ::

[dropkick]

Here's the part where I ask how you already know my name.

private; unhackable ::

[signatures]

[ A curse, then. ]

Lucky guess.

private; unhackable ::

[dropkick]

no such thing - not with this.

private; unhackable ::

[signatures]

As opposed to with other things?

[boutant]

You know he can probably see this, right? [ Whoever he is... ]

[dropkick]

More 'likely' than 'probably', yes.

[boutant]

He'll probably be pissed.

[dropkick]

One can only hope.

[boutant]

You want to be fired?

[dropkick]

depending on how early I have to be up? yes.

[boutant]

So quit.

[dropkick]

need something else in line first

[ which begs the question why post this at all, but in the history existing in the cursed parties' heads, there've been posts like this for years and no firing as of yet...of course no one else knows that ]

[boutant]

maybe you shouldn't make posts that are going to piss your boss off before you find a new job then. btw no one is going to want to hire you after seeing this.

[ Oh Arthur, she thought you were so smart. ]

[dropkick]

[ he is. he wouldn't do it if he didn't know he could get away with it, after all. his track record declares as much. ]

no one will need to, if it goes the way it usually does.

[boutant]

if it goes the way it usually does.

wow.

[dropkick]

just going by the track record.

[boutant]

maybe he'll switch things up

[dropkick]

he could - there's always that possibility.

[ what he doesn't say is: but i think i earn my weight in complaints anyway....

...even arthur figures there are limits to how far he can push the recurring gag. cough. ]

anon;

[pinwheeled]

so what's your plan of action if the boss finds this post

anon;

[dropkick]

depends on what said boss has to say about it

anon;

[pinwheeled]

something tells me it might go something like this

ATTACHED: arthur.gif

anon;

[dropkick]

http://28.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m30wjcAcnn1ssdy9vo1_500.jpg

anon;

[pinwheeled]

is there supposed to be a point there, or

anon;

[dropkick]

he's considering his place in the universe - heroically, fiscally...

anon;

[pinwheeled]

oh of course
but is he considering just how lucky he is to be in that place in this kind of economy

anon;

[dropkick]

he's getting to that part; it happens right before the chapter where he and his boss clasp hands and skip together...

anon;

[pinwheeled]

sounds to me like the author of this little tale doesn't have a realistic idea of how this sort of thing pans out

anon;

[dropkick]

maybe he has a different sense of reality than most. how would you end the story?

anon;

[pinwheeled]

that depends entirely on what course of action mister batman decides to take

anon;

[dropkick]

and from where you're sitting, batman's options would be...?

[pratful]

[ oh, hey. A blog. He's been told about those things.

Tap, tap, tap... ]

Everything sounds perfectly reasonable to me. What's the big deal?

[ Thank all that is holy that Arthur does not have a blog. Permanently anon'd ]

[dropkick]

[ ...l;dsf;kl;fkds;fkdsl;fkds;kfl;dsfk;dsk ]

He's a dictator. That's the big deal.

[ snarked he of the pinstriped persnickety...ness

...but somehow one gets the feeling Arthur of armor's blog would be exponentially more popular.... ]

[pratful]

If you don't like it, quit.

[ he's been telling Merlin that for ages.

... so it's a popularity contest then is it? Shall they see who looks better in a suit then? Arthur's confident hah! he'd win. ]

[dropkick]

easier said than done - the job market's a jungle

[ or a battlefield...which might have been a less appropriate but more relatable parallel... ]

[pratful]

And complaining is doing you a lick of good on top of that, is it? If you can't handle it, leave or do better. Perhaps there's a reason your employer is being an ass.

[ pot calling kettle? Nah... ]