poly_chromatic

[Penny has been MIA since October thirteenth. Close friends and workers at the Centers knew about the first disappearance, when she stayed in the hospital until the twenty-third.

Fewer people know about her second disappearance. Suffice it to say, she never returned to work after the first visit.]

Last month was awful. I'm sure plenty of people're still recovering from it... and maybe there're a few who won't ever get over it completely. If you're one of those people, don't hate yourself for not being able to put everything behind you. What's important is that you're still here.

What I mean is... you know, life's hard. There're plenty of good and beautiful things in the world--in all worlds, I mean--but there's also pain and suffering. People get hurt for no reason, people die senselessly or way too young, children starve to death, zombies attack. It sucks. It really does. Almost everyone here has seen awful things... had awful things done to them. But we're all still doing what we can to live.

I'm not going to say that everything happens for a reason or that what doesn't kill you makes you stronger or anything like that. Everything just happens, and some of those things are terrible. Sometimes we can bounce back from terrible things. Sometimes they hurt us so much that we'll never be the same again. Either way, we keep on living. We keep appreciating beautiful things like love and sunrises. No matter how much we hurt or suffer, we hang on because we're strong enough to get through the bad to get to the good. The strength to do that comes from us, not from what happens to us.

It takes courage to live. I think that's what I'm trying to say. A lot of courage.

I hope everyone's doing okay.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

She'd probably like that. Gettin' discovered after she died, I mean. It'd make her seem like a real famous artist, y'know? Doin' it properly like that. Maybe if I ever get back home, I can sell some of her stuff.

Yeah, I do. Poetry, mostly.

I hope that happens for her. Someday. Not too soon, because I kind of like having you here.

That's so neat. Do you ever share any of it?

It'll happen someday. I kinda like bein' here, too. Maybe someone else back home could do it. There were other people she was close to, anyway, that understood her art better than I did.

[He shakes his head.]

Nah. Just never figured anyone'd be interested.

Art's hard that way. I still don't understand it and I majored in it for four years. Creative things like that... I had this teacher once who said how we interpret art tells us more about ourselves than the painting or poem or whatever we're looking at.

I'd be interested.

You got a degree in it? I didn't know that. How come I didn't know that? Seems like the kinda thing I'd've known... guess we get caught up in other stuff here.

Yeah? Maybe sometime you can read it. It ain't exactly cheerful.

A fine arts degree isn't really anything to brag about, and I never did anything with it. There're always more exciting things to talk about.

I'd like to. A lot of the art--paintings, poetry, whatever--I like isn't too cheerful.

Hey, it's better than my less than a year of an English degree.

Sometime I'll show it to you. Long as you don't mock me too bad, y'know.

You had other stuff to worry about. Where I'm from, practically everyone has to have a degree to even get a job.

I'd never mock you.

That so? Maybe it's for the best I ain't from your time, then. I'd be unemployed for sure.

You'd be in good company. I think I've spent more time without a job than with one since I was old enough to work.

You can always say you were devotin' your time to artistic pursuits, right?

Artistic pursuits and nonprofit organizations.

What would you have done if life had just been peaceful and mellow? Become a poet?

Sure, I'd've been a poet, 'n Angela'd've been a painter, 'n we'd've lived somewhere a hell of a lot more interestin' than Atlantic City.

Like a crappy apartment on the wrong side of town? Poets and painters don't make a lot of money, but that can be interesting in its own way.

[A laugh.]

Nah, I've lived in enough crappy apartments on the wrong side of town to last me a lifetime. Probably I'd've done what my da--

[He cuts himself off there, shakes his head, then keeps going.]

--the guy who paid for my college wanted me to do. Y'know, get a business degree, 'n be a businessman on the weekdays 'n a poet the rest of the time. 'n then Angela could've painted, 'n we could've still lived in a nice house on the beach.

[Penny gives Jimmy a hug instead of commenting on the slip up.]

You'd've been good at business, I bet. Where would you have wanted to live?

Oh, I dunno. How about the west coast? California, maybe. Angela always wanted to live in France, but I dunno if I could've done it.

[A hug back.]

What about you?

Well, if you ever get to California, don't bother with Los Angeles. France sounds nice, though. Eiffel Tower, croissants... mimes...

I dunno. I can't imagine being anywhere but exactly where I was.

Didn't like France, much, when I was there.

[But that was the war, of course. He might have liked Paris. Mimes aside.]

Well, that's good, right? Means you were pretty content where you were.

You probably just didn't get to see the better parts of it.

I was. [But there's no going back home, sooo...] The City's good too, though. Aside from when things happen.

Y'know, I like the City pretty well, too. Never thought I'd say that, but it sure is better than the alternative.

[Even without his son? That's not something to comment on.]

Maybe when Anonymous figures this whole City thing out, they'll really be able to let some of us stay if we want to.