161 DIAGNOSIS

[vicodincrutch]

I made a list. It's called Things Cripples Shouldn't Do. It's publishing date is pending because it's a long, long, long, long, [sigh] long list I have. Some of it may seem redundant but specifics are always necessary.

A great deal of ninjitsu is the new item.

Why am I telling you this? You should know. This may be beneficial to your life. I might even get a thank you out of it someday.

Comments

[unflagging]

You should publish that list. I might know some cripples who could use it.

[vicodincrutch]

Might? So he's sort of cripple.

[unflagging]

Yeah, he's only partially crippled, not a complete cripple yet. But he'll get there, don't worry.

[vicodincrutch]

You're a kind, inspirational companion. I'll think it over. What's his malady?

[unflagging]

He's missing a couple of fingers, and he's gotten old enough that one of his hips is giving him trouble. Probably something like arthritis. It's kind of pathetic, really.

[just_displaced]

I'd say that all of this ninja stuff should be avoided in general.

[vicodincrutch]

What about the real ninjas then? They should get real jobs?

[just_displaced]

Well, yeah. I bet that's what their parents say, right? That's what parents everywhere say. "Stop that ninjaing around and get a real job."

[vicodincrutch]

You sound like a grateful child.

[just_displaced]

What, your parents never said that to you?

[vicodincrutch]

No, actually. And I was told many, many things.

[just_displaced]

Lucky you. On the other hand, I'm gonna guess that you never wanted to become a ninja, either. Then they might've said that.

[as_damaged]

Rough curse?

MULAN ROLL FOR YOU CAMERON

[vicodincrutch]

As rocky as a riverbed with all the force of a great typhoon. I have pains like a raging fire.

[as_damaged]

I don't think my pain chart has raging fire on it. I'll make a note.

Nothing serious?