[video]

[hischair]

— iece of crap. [ There's grumbling as the viewscreen jostles, bright blue (bloodshot) eyes squinting into it curiously. The would-be handsome face glances away a moment later, eyebrows pulled together; he's sick or was prior to arriving, more worn out from the exertion of walking than any young man ought to be. ] Alright, good. You'll do for the time being.

This is Captain Kirk of the starship Enterprise ordering any and all Federation crewmen to report back with the location of the nearest Starfleet outpost. I'm off-world when I shouldn't be. This "computer" — [ you can practically see the airquotes around his sour tone ] — isn't responding as it should or giving me the information I need. I'm getting nothing but interference when I try and open a standard sub-space channel, the frequency's all off ... damn, this thing's gonna fry if I keep messing with it.

[ Opening his mouth to continue, a hurk noise clogs his throat and hastily, the video clatters to the ground as Jim reels around to vomit into the fountain. Classy. ]

[ Of course, where a sick Jim is, a wild, angry Bones appears. ]

Goddammit, Jim! [ He's there all of a sudden, a hand on jim's shoulder holding him for support and a - somewhat crazy expression on his face. ] Jesus Christ, why are you out of the medbay if you're sick?! Don't move or I'll hypo your ass!

Comments

video;

[universaltranslator]

[Nothing feels real. She knows that she knows this place, that she's lived a life here, but it's impossible for those memories to live side by side with the ones from her real life, the life she just came from. The effort of trying to process it all makes her feel a little sick herself.

But she's on the network anyway, because if there's one thing Uhura knows how to do, it's her job, and her job is to monitor communications channels.]

Captain?

video;

[hischair]

[ Spitting a sour mouthful into the water, he waves Bones off and tilts the camera so Uhura can clock the sight of the two of them. ]

Lieutenant, good to see you. Uh. Any idea what's going on here?

[ Why the hell am I alive, goes unspoken, but he's trying to be tactful for myriad reasons. ]

video; i said i was gonna empty my inbox first but.

[medicos]

Lieutenant. [ formalities, for now. as far as bones knows, they're on the job. ] Are you unharmed?

action ;

[medicos]

Jim? [ he's just going to - try and turn Jim over, so he can see his face, a hand rubbing on his back supporting him in case he falls. Bones' own expression is as exasperated as it should be when faced with Jim and his ever-frustrating immune system, but it's also pinched with nervousness, because he hasn't seen Jim this sick in - well, a year. ]

[hischair]

What is going on? Jesus, I never thought I'd open my eyes again.

[ He grasps onto Bones' arm to pull himself up determinedly with a wince. At least the broiling grit in his stomach is out and he can breathe without wanting to hurl. ]

[synanthrope]

Hello.

You'll keep getting interference.

[hischair]

That's massively unhelpful, thanks. Why will we keep getting it?

[medicos]

[ after her conversation with jim.

mildly: ] He didn't take that very well, did he?

[pinkeffinprofessional]

[He was eating his breakfast, all hunky dory, when-]

Bones?

Holy shit- Bones?

[medicos]

[ automatic, like he's said it a hundred times before: ] Don't call me that.

[ and then: ] Sorry, may I know who this is?

[hischair]

[ Immediate inner reaction: who the hell is calling Bones 'Bones' besides me? Squinting at the video, Jim frowns. ]

And you are —?

[V i d e o]

[silvering]

Unfortunately you will not be able to communicate with anyone outside of this city.

[V i d e o]

[hischair]

Why not? I'm getting a lot of useless replies here, help me out.

[medicos]

Well, we've gathered that much by now.

[ a beat. ] But thanks.

video;

[subecho]

We salute you, Captain. Mind the hipogriff.

video;

[hischair]

At ease, beardy. What's a hippogriff? It's not going to try and eat me, is it?

[ He's had bad experiences with the wildlife on other planets. ]

video;

[medicos]

A Hipo-what?

video;

[candothat]

Captain Kirk! Dr. McCoy! You are at the fountain?

video;

[hischair]

Chekov! Thank God, we heard you were floating around. Yeah, we're here, come rescue our asses and fill us in on what the hell's going on.

video;

[hexuality]

[Merlin's balls, she knows these two.]

Jim? [Pause.] Er, Bones? Right? No—Dr McCoy.

[She grins though it's a little bewildered, apologetic.]

Or I can pretend I don't know you at all if it'll make adjusting a bit easier.

video;

[medicos]

[ oh no. ]

Okay, first things first: if people are going to insist calling me by my name here, fine. It's Leonard. Don't call me Bones when he's around. Apparently he's patented the nickname without my knowledge, and I'd rather not a repeat of the last time someone called me Bones in front of him.

[ clearly this was the most important detail he had to address. ]

[missrosetyler]

Right.

You're a long ways away from Starfleet, there mate. Lightyears even. But that's putting it kindly.

[hischair]

That doesn't sound too far.

[vengefully]

That message of yours won't reach anywhere outside of this place, unfortunately.

[hischair]

I figured there was a feedback loop going on with the perimeter, there wasn't any point trying to contact my ship. Do you know who's the big shot around here, now that some so-called deities or whatever have been offed? I'm angling for a name.

shhhh don't mind my lateness

[thefavorite]

Hi.

[ You puked, Kirk. He approves. ]

Do you really have a starship?

neverrr

[hischair]

Uh, yeah. Big thing, beautiful and shiny. [ Squinting as he spits phlegm out. ] You're really tiny ... or do I still have snot in my eyes?

video

[flammiferous]

[Oh gross, he turns on his communicator for the first time in a few days (for lacking interest of having one in the first place), and vomit is what he gets.]

Forget trying, this junk is useless. [OR MAYBE HE JUST DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO USE IT???] And now you've convinced me to sell it.

video

[hischair]

[ BLERRRGH. Heartless asshole, he's irradiated (okay, formerly but still) over here! ]

Met my quota today of Things I Don't Give A Shit About, great.