poly_chromatic | 042 x 240 // text // scars I never had

Entry tags:

oc - carla morir

042 x 240 // text // scars I never had

Is it pathetic that I almost wish this was permanent?

If you have something of mine [...Pause.]

Well. Sorry for you.

[[ooc; Switched scars with Jimmy. He is assuredly having a bad day.]]

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I don't want to go to the hospital.

[It's just that simple.]

You're bleeding, aren't you?

That's nothing new.

[Seriously, Mae.]

Seriously, Clara.

I'm fine.

[The one person with any sway over her is in the hospital today.]

[Gah. People who ignore hospitals are just -

She can't exactly speak here, since it's not like she ever took the Ryves brothers to any hospital, and they'd suffered their fair share of injuries. Although, granted, Alan was always a good shot, and Nick healed. Still. She gets it - some people reject that environment.] Do you have desinfectant, at least?

It's not going to kill me.

[Obviously hasn't killed whoever it belonged to.]

Yes, yes, I get it - you've great resistence to pain and aren't bothered by bloodspill and all that, but I'm asking you if you've got anything to at least wrap it up with or stop the flow or - hell, I don't know, not bleed for the whole day.

I've wrapped it. I'll clean the apartment tomorrow.

[For all her resistance to the hospital, she is a clean freak. She also has a small puppy she doesn't need to be bleeding on. Can you hear Peanut yipping for his breakfast, Mae?]

[Can you hear the tired sigh? Almost imagine the way she rubs her eyes because some people are so complicated and some things are such a mess right now? No? Well.]

I suppose I'll just have to trust that you'll take care of yourself.

[Hhh. Less sass from you, young lady.]

I will actually be alright.

[She knows it was a lie last time.]

It's just for today.

[Can't, sorry. It's there, like a disease.]

Yeah...[You can tell she's not sure what to believe. She's not sure of a lot of things, honestly. Congratulations for making her life confusing, Clara. Bah.] I'll never understand that.

Never understand what?

How some people can just brush injuries aside like they're nothing big.

Mae...

[And this is the Carla who went away to the psychiatric ward talking, not the Carla who kissed her on the street.]

I've spent five years trying to claw off my own skin any way I can.

[No, and - Mae doesn't know much about this Carla. Didn't know much about the Carla who kissed her on the street, either, other than the fact that they were good kisses. Excellent kisses. But hearing it...

Goes to show, doesn't it? You think you want to know everything about a person but what happens when you're not ready to hear what they've got to say?]

...I don't know what to say to that. [And she sounds genuinely sorry, because she genuinely is.]

There's nothing for you to say.

[Sorry doesn't help. She doesn't need anyone to be sorry for her, she's been sorry enough for herself that she wants to vomit (that she wants to claw off all the sorriness.

Pain means something much different to Carla.]

No, probably not...[Sorry'd probably help as much as condolensces would at a funeral.]

Do you still try?

[Sigh.]

Not... in a few weeks.

[Which is something.]

I've been... painting, instead.

[She wants to ask why. She wants to ask why she wants to ask why she wants to ask why-]

Does painting help?

It's something else to do. I work. I train.

[There's the suggestion of a shrug.]

Keeping busy.

Well - I understand that part. Keeping busy.

Some distractions work.

Edited 2012-11-16 00:34 (UTC)

[She's not even bringing up the sex again. She thinks... she doesn't really want to involve Mae in that anymore.]

Some. Sometimes.

[She's been doing better.]

[There's a small pause, and - yes, in a way, it feels about as silly as getting close to Nick felt, but she's still going to do it, because it's horrible to know that someone hurts and you do nothing to help.]

Hey, listen...I know we're not incredibly close, but - if you ever find yourself needing a distraction...

I'll spare you.

042 x 240 // text // scars I never had

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