poly_chromatic | 027: VIDEO

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house m.d. - robert chase

027: VIDEO

[Chase steeples his fingers together, looking at the camera.]

Quick update. Unless it's a congenital condition, this hospital regrets it's unable to perform amputations on anyone finding themselves conjoined.

Believe me, we've tried. Turns out, it hurts you more than it hurts us.

[And he leans forward.]

Give it five days and I reckon we'll find out if it's a curse or not. Until then, try steering clear of the circus.

[And leans back again, picking up something from his desk.]

In the meantime, if you went home from the library yesterday with a book you didn't want on Multiple Myeloma, then I might have something of yours.

[ It's held up for the camera. TADA.]

I'll leave it with reception, so no need to thank me in person. Really.

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[There's video, but she isn't in frame.]

Did you read it?

I consulted my soul. It didn't feel like chicken soup today.

[Chase. You and your crappy references... She doesn't sound all the way exasperated.]

What are you talking about.

Twenty-first century strain of nauseatingly uplifting self-comfort literature primarily aimed at lonely depressives with cats.

[Which... you just described yourself, Chase.]

[Some curtains are fluttering in reply.]

You have a cat.

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Yes, thank you, doctor. We'll handle these things as we see fit.

'We' being?

Why, my fellow travelers and I, of course! All we who oversee the performances in our humble show.

The circus. Then you've already been handling more than you should.

Oh, dear doctor, don't be like that.

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Why are people so fucking stupid.

I'll take that book, though.

I don't know, but I'd have to be if I believed you asked the library for books about guilty cats.

I never said I asked for it.

Then what do you want it for?

I want to learn how to get you to forgive yourself if you turn into a cat.

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Hope the deities don't turn you into one.

[Joking, of course, but the punch isn't quite there today.]

I wouldn't mind a cat. They're sneaky.

Everything all right?

I've got three of them. I know.

[A huff of breath.]

This circus thing's gone too far.

No.

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Oh hey, that's what this place needs, elaborate self help books about cats.

You don't need to play coy. It's at the reception desk, I'm sure they won't ask your name.

It's not mine, but hey if nobody claims it can I have it? I think it'll make a great gift for Derek.

Interesting reading.

I hadn't thought to check.

The cancer one probably makes for a better read.

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