poly_chromatic | (no subject)

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oc - theodred sammeth

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[It's hard to tell what the gentleman is thinking as a pair of sunglasses cover half his face. From the tone of his voice it's easy to tell that he's exasperated, tired and pissed off. He's dressed in a very expensive business suit that is currently a bit singed, has some blood on it, and very rumpled. Clearly someone has been busy before they arrived here and hasn't had a chance to change.]

Another kidnapping? Really. Don't you people ever get tired of it?

I have to say it's pretty good for a kidnapping. I mean, I didn't even feel the transfer and that's damn hard to do.

[He pauses and looks around to get a better sense of his surroundings.]

Are you fair folk? It doesn't feel like Faery.

[That said, he shrugs dismissing the matter out of hand. Faery or not, he's still been kidnapped after all. That's what needs to be dealt with.]

Anyway. It'd be best to let me go back right now for everyone's sake. My father will be pissed off when he finds me missing and his temper is already frayed and my fiancee will be pissed off and her temper is even more frayed.

This seems like a nice place, if odd. So instead of pissing off the god of the dead and the warmage just let me go home and I won't mention it. This will save a lot of lives in the long run.

I've got enough on my plate already.

Please, don't add any more.

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Or Éomer's best buddy.

My cult. Nothing good ever comes from that statement man.

Dude. Wizards are taking their lives in their hands going into the Nevernever, vanilla mortals would get slaughtered. Or enslaved. Or both.

He didn't even get a cool horse.

It's an inherited thing. Any necromancers in my family get this particular cult. I've tried getting them to stop sending me the goat zombies but they're just so earnest about it. I got a cow when they found out I was getting married. My cousin's cult is much nicer. She gets lost treasure from the sea.

Wizard at what? And what's a vanilla mortal?

[We now come to a translation problem. Everyone in his world has magical talents. And when someone is a wizard at something they're exceptional in their field.]

He might have had a cool horse. Not everyone can be main characters in the story man.

Necromancers. There's another freaky red flag. Treasure isn't bad though.

Wizard at uh... magic? Vanilla mortal as in no supernatural anything. No magic, no fae blood, mostly just guns and words.

((Harry's starting to get used to that but not completely obviously))

Maybe it's somewhere in the extensive notes he's written.

My father is a god of the dead. What else would I be? A seismo-mage? Besides, unlicensed necromancy is illegal. You need at least four years of post grad to get a degree in it if you're not born with the knack. Not that it stops the goth kids, but when you're fifteen you think that everyone hates you anyway and then you find necromancy for dummies in some used bookstore.

[Why yes, he did just say you could study necromancy in college.]

Everyone has magic. How else could we do anything? You can't trigger a cooling can without it. I mean some people are gifted than others, but everyone has it.

I am willing to bet your father knows.

There was so much wrong with everything you just said.

Um... generally with electricity. My world has a lot of people who don't have any magic at all and some that have barely enough to register. Small talents. Wizards are pretty rare. [In fact, the White Court Vampires call them freaks]

Probably.

I don't see why. My fiancee is a war mage and she can do a heck of a lot more damage by herself than some school taught necromancer.

Electricity is a part of how things run, sure. I guess we just don't have anyone with no magic. Everyone has small talents and then you go up from there. People who are really talented are a small part of the population. It's where you get your brain surgeons and ritual mages and physicists from.

Is that sort of a warrior wizard or something?

I don't know many wizards I'd trust to poke around my brain.

Military. Specialize in making things go boom.

You need to get a medical degree before doing that...

Oh hey, I'm a boom wizard! And a finding things wizard. Not so much the military thing though.

Well thank goodness for that. I know a guy who I'd let do it, he's gotten about eight degrees I think. But I don't know how fond he is of doing surgery. Mostly I got to my buddy the morti-forensic specialist.

Boom wizard is different than war mage. You only get to be called a war mage if you go into the military. Enne, my fiancee, is a War Mage. She only made sergeant before she left because she kept on pissing off her superior officers.

Are they medical degrees? I wouldn't let anyone with healing talent use theirs on me unless they had a degree in whatever it is they're planning on doing to me. You don't want a dentist doing knee surgery.

Oh I thought you made up the boom wizard thing. I tend to cause a lot of property damage. I was a Warden, kind of like a police officer in a sheriffy kinda way.

Yeah he's gone through med school quite a few times. Does an update ever half century or so.

It's slang for the folks good with blowing stuff up? Enne's great with property damage. Her personal motto is 'if I can't kill it with fire, I'm not using enough fire'.

I kinda do the police officer thing a bit. Well, I'm on a trouble shooting team for the stuff that governments don't want to touch.

How old is he?

That was my motto for a while. Until there was collateral damage. I've tried to keep it under control.

Heey, you know Mulder?

Never asked. He was around before the white man took over America.

That's what Adrian, Anna and I are for. Make sure she doesn't go fire happy. She's generally pretty good. It's just her weapon of choice.

The X-Files character? We're not actually FBI though we occasionally steal cases from them.

Sounds like Rhys.

She needs three people to keep her in check? I mean it's always good to have someone to tell you if you get a little crazy but still.

Bet they love that.

I wouldn't say keep her in check. She wears high heels and would use them on my foot. But to gently remind her that killing it with fire isn't always the best solution. Mind you, she held her own against a dragon once. A young dragon, but still, a dragon.

Actually, they do. It means they don't have to deal with it.

Ahh you wouldn't say it. I get it man. I've only ever met one dragon, I have a friend who slayed one once. Not really my gig as long as they're not eating innocents or anything.

Man all the FBI guys I've ever met got hot under the collar about jurisdiction. Of course they were werewolves so maybe that has something to do with it. But the police weren't and they generally act the same way.

There are some things a man does to protect himself and his love life.

I've been kidnapped by a dragon before.

In our case I think it amounts to the FBI have to deal with a potentially disastrous incident or having Merlin deal with a potentially disastrous incident.

Ahh she's your girl?

... uh... don't they usually go for pretty young virgins? I think it's in their contract.

I've never known the brass to be logical in these cases.

Fiancee. We were going to get married in a few months but recent events have probably pushed it back a bit more. The media'll love it.

Pretty young virgins generally don't have A. father that's pissed them off and b. a lot of money.

If Merlin told you that he was going to do something, would you tell him no?

Congrats regardless. Sounds like she'll keep you on your toes.

Yeah but they're pretty young virgins, I don't think they need those things. Gold though, I can see your point.

Well a few days ago I told him he was shelving things wrong. [Oh yeah, he timed that for a reaction]

She does. But in a good way.

[Love is grand.]

My father apparently pissed this one off a few centuries ago.

Oh yeah? And how'd he take it? Hit you over the head with something or just glare? [Perhaps not the reaction Harry was hoping. Theo isn't as in awe of his Merlin - Rhys as he's known now- as some people.]

Why didn't he just steal his money?

Actually he's pretty personable. I think I only annoy him a little bit. [Disappointed wizard is disappointed]

She. And because dragons like to complicate things and revenge is more fun when you can make it personal and my father owns the banks.

He can be, in a bit of a gruff and permanently crotchety way. I think we all annoy him in our own little ways. Currently Trever's familiar's kittens are annoying him the most.

[Necromancer was disappointed too. So it's all fair.]

That's a lot of specifics, you buddies with the dragon or something?

He didn't seem crotchety to me. Bit gawky but otherwise pleasant. The who's what?