(carolena) lady of sorrows (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
dignity_misery) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
poly_chromatic2014-01-14 05:58 pm
dignity_misery) wrote in poly_chromatic2014-01-14 05:58 pm
Entry tags:
073 x 370 // video/action
[ The device, as always, is in her pocket and as always it is not the cellphone she is familiar with. It will not call Facon, and it will not call Cotnari. She's almost used to it now though, being jerked back and forth between lives, expectations, sitting in between states and never able to settle into one.
She's dressed well, for once, a white suit and sunglasses. She had been on a boat, watching a pirate lounge in front of her ganglord and ask what he could do for her.
Carla stares down into the device in her palm and it flickers to life, always so obnoxiously cheeky.
Carla's resigned to it. ]
You never can resist interrupting.
[ A hand goes back through her hair, and she looks around the square. Only a few people look back at her. It is, in fact, not the strange for people to come out of the sky around here. ]
I'm sure you all must have missed me.
ACTION
THE BEACHFRONT FLAT.
[ The dogs had trashed her flat before clawing open one of the back doors and escaping outside. They'd also come back upon catching something to eat, dragging the corpses of little animals everywhere, littering her back porch with cast-off pieces. The smell is horrendous, and in its own way makes her violently hungry. First, however, she has to drag everything out of the flat and onto the back patio so that she can sanitize the wood floors. There's also a garbage can filled with rotten food and animal bits.
Pants rolled up to her knees and handkerchief across her face, she scrubs diligently, all the doors and windows open. ]
THE GROCERY STORE.
[ Her bank account untouched, there's nothing keeping her from replacing the food which had spoiled in her fridge during her absence. She also needs to buy dog food.
Her cart is full of chocolate, meat, and fancy animal feed. ]
THE CAFE.
[ And when the work is done, she takes herself down to the cafe off the square to people watch, and to look for people she knows. ]
She's dressed well, for once, a white suit and sunglasses. She had been on a boat, watching a pirate lounge in front of her ganglord and ask what he could do for her.
Carla stares down into the device in her palm and it flickers to life, always so obnoxiously cheeky.
Carla's resigned to it. ]
You never can resist interrupting.
[ A hand goes back through her hair, and she looks around the square. Only a few people look back at her. It is, in fact, not the strange for people to come out of the sky around here. ]
I'm sure you all must have missed me.
ACTION
THE BEACHFRONT FLAT.
[ The dogs had trashed her flat before clawing open one of the back doors and escaping outside. They'd also come back upon catching something to eat, dragging the corpses of little animals everywhere, littering her back porch with cast-off pieces. The smell is horrendous, and in its own way makes her violently hungry. First, however, she has to drag everything out of the flat and onto the back patio so that she can sanitize the wood floors. There's also a garbage can filled with rotten food and animal bits.
Pants rolled up to her knees and handkerchief across her face, she scrubs diligently, all the doors and windows open. ]
THE GROCERY STORE.
[ Her bank account untouched, there's nothing keeping her from replacing the food which had spoiled in her fridge during her absence. She also needs to buy dog food.
Her cart is full of chocolate, meat, and fancy animal feed. ]
THE CAFE.
[ And when the work is done, she takes herself down to the cafe off the square to people watch, and to look for people she knows. ]
no subject
[Or maybe it's too complex to explain to one outside the ring.]
Well, that's good to hear. Oh, and welcome back, by the way.
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[ Only slightly sullen, and well. Since she's back. ]
When can I meet them.
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I see the City didn't fall to pieces while I was away.
[ A viable theory, she has no investment in The Movement, but she's no good at faith either. ]
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You don't think it's so fragile here as all that, do you? After all, haven't you heard? The City is a crossroads in and out of all worlds. So long as it survives, so too do our worlds.
Now, of course, the question is whether you believe that.
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[ A completely honest answer. ]
I can't control any of it.
[ And always that note veiled note of self-disgust. ]
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Here is what I told that same friend once, or some part of it:
Everything in the universe denies nothing; to suggest an ending is the one absurdity. Your heart's desire is to be told some mystery. The mystery is that there is no mystery.
If you fell outward to the limit of the universe, would you find a board fence and signs reading DEAD END? No. You might find something hard and rounded, as the chick must see the egg from the inside. And if you should peck through the shell (or find a door), what great and torrential light might shine through your opening at the end of space? Might you look through and discover our entire universe is but part of one atom on a blade of grass? Might you be forced to think that by burning a twig you incinerate an eternity of eternities? That existence rises not to one infinite but to an infinity of them?
Perhaps you have already seen what place our universe plays in the scheme of things--as no more than an atom in a blade of grass. Could it be that everything we can perceive, from the microscopic virus to the distant Horsehead Nebula, is contained in one blade of grass that may have existed for only a single season in an alien time-flow? What if that blade should be cut off by a scythe? When it begins to die, would the rot seep into our universe and our own lives, turning everything yellow and brown and desiccated? Perhaps it's already begun to happen.
Think how small such a concept of things make us. If a God watches over it all, does He actually mete out justice for such a race of gnats? Does His eye see the sparrow fall when the sparrow is less than a speck of hydrogen floating disconnected in the depth of space? And if He does see... what must the nature of such a God be? Where does He live? How is it possible to live beyond infinity?
Imagine the dust of the Mojave Desert, which surely you have seen or have seen something akin to it, and imagine a trillion universes--not worlds but universes--encapsulated in each grain of that desert; and within each universe an infinity of others. We tower over these universes from our pitiful grass vantage point; with one swing of your boot you may knock a billion billion worlds flying off into darkness, a chain never to be completed.
What control might any of us have in such a scheme of things? I only ask. I expect no answer.
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I would enjoy destroying a world.
[ She confides to him, rather than truly engage the grand multitude of all the many universes. She is too small for it, and truthfully she prefers it that way. Her life was better before the magic. Simpler. ]
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I suspect you would. A consummation devoutly to be wished.
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Have you ever indulged?
[ In world-ending. If there's anyone to ask about it, she really does suspect it's him. ]
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[ She agrees amiably. She likes having secrets all to herself. ]
A secret from your friend too?
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But that doesn't answer your question, does it?
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