poly_chromatic | (no subject)

Entry tags:

oc - saya wallace

(no subject)

[There's crying, here.

It's a woman crying, a woman who does not realize she's being recorded on audio.]

I don't think-

I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

[There's no one else speaking, and then the sound of a door opening, and a very low kind of wail - not loud, just insistent.]

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torqued]

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The ones in there-

[She reaches for him, and her touch is so gentle, like maybe he'll disappear-]

The ones over the last fifteen years-

[The ones in there... more things he doesn't think about, makes a specific effort not to.]

The ones you eat?

The ones I eat-

[She sobs out that last part, the ones she eats-]

[He sighs - some of it relief, curling around her, tucking her head under his chin.]

When's that ever been a choice?

[She lets out a sob, anyway, and presses her face against his shirt]

[He curls a hand under her hair, rubbing across the nape of her neck the way you soothe a fretting child.]

Are you going to believe me if I say this isn't like you?

I know-

[She wraps her fingers into his shirt]

I lost the spider.

[Well. He's not sure how he feels about that, not anymore, but he nudges her chin up.]

Let me have a look?

Inside?

[She looks back to the door to the sylie]

[He clicks his tongue.]

Not inside there.

[There's a flashlight pen clipped to the keyring in his pocket. He clicks it on in the halflight.]

[She sits back a bit, but nods.]

[It's not really an examination, he just lets the light cross her face and smiles.]

She likes to tell me you're not home. But I recognise you well enough.

There's no she. Just me.

[She puts her hands on his face]

Robert.

[He can't separate it quite like that. Can't say he loves her despite the spider - he just does.]

Hi.

Do you still love me?

[There's a part of that question that isn't clinical, it's so human and painful, so unlike Saya.]

[For him, at least, the reply is simple.]

All ways.

[She moves her hands into his hair, gets closer]

I keep thinking, it's okay, because I do it to survive, but then-

All those people.

[It's hard to reconcile the two.]

You feel like that because it's not your nature it's feeding. It's different for her. She doesn't get the luxury of going through an angsty vegetarian phase.

I'm so sorry.

You don't have cause to be. You don't have cause to be guilty, either. It wasn't your fault.

[But that's logic and that's not how emotions work.]

[She gives a sigh. At least she's not crying anymore. Instead she just leaning on him, head on his shoulder.]

[Crying's never a look he'll get used to on her, but he'll give her time, curling his fingers into her hair.

There are questions that need to be asked, though.]

Are you.. going to need to eat today?

I think I should focus on...real food.

[She means that the idea of blood turns her stomach.]

It saves me opening a vein.

[Which he would have, if that had been the choice.]

We can think about that when we decide it's safe to get out of the closet.

You deserve someone so much better than me.

[She doesn't think that, most of the time. When she's being logical and detached, anyway]