poly_chromatic | Action / Accidental Video

[There’s no way Ginsberg’s been looking at the communicator. No, it might as well not exist at all, although it is recording, although he's unaware of it. Instead, he’s sitting on the edge of the fountain, soaking wet, talking to… whoever happens to wander by -- and, apparently, to the network, as well.]

Where am I? Is this some kind of drug induced hallucination? Because let me tell you right now, I don’t do that kind of thing. If someone snuck something into my coffee, I’m gonna be mad. I keep telling everyone, that stuff makes me paranoid. And now something’s making me hallucinate a whole city.

[He scrubs a hand across his face, shaking the water out of his hair as he does so.]

I have work to do. This account, this Manischewitz account, I have to get to the meeting.

[A slight grumble, and then…]

Not that I want to go, anyway. If someone could point me back to Madison Avenue, though, that’d be great. Really great. In fact, look, I’ll buy you lunch or something if you can get me out of here. Just get me out of here.

[He puts his head in his hands.]

I don’t know what the hell’s going on...

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[All of this flattery. How does he even handle it?]

I'll keep that in mind. You're the kind guy who tells it like it is. None of this "you'll be fine" bullshit. I mean, not that I don't respect bullshit, obviously, but in a situation like this, it's good to hear that there're practical ways to deal with it. I'm not a fan of meaningless reassurances.

[ur teh best @ bullshit, Ginsberg]

I promise you that I will never bullshit unnecessarily. Practicality is far more useful than reassurance.

I'm glad to hear you're leaving the field open for necessary bullshit. Smart kid. Not that you're actually that much younger than me, I guess, but hey.

[Ginsberg is racking up points. No one over the age of, like, sixteen ever assumes he's about the same age as them.]

Bullshitting when necessary is the most I can do, sadly. I have never had to do it professionally and have no natural talent for it. Perhaps you could give lessons.

Sure. Is that the kind of thing they pay for? I mean, being a bullshit tutor is one of those things that could have a lot of practicality. Maybe I'll open up my own business.

In the City, you can be paid for anything that at least one person has an interest in. I have an interest in learning bullshit. So, yes, that is the kind of thing that you can be paid for.

Why do you want to learn bullshit? I have to make sure you'll use it for good and not for evil. I don't want to inadvertently create a monster.

[He smiles winningly, tapping into his reserves of charm and cuteness.]

Because I am a terrible liar. It is only fair that I learn to exaggerate artfully to make up for this shortcoming, and I vow to cause no trouble.

Well, on the bright side, that smile's got you about halfway there anyway. I bet people find it hard to resist.

All right, well, if you're not going to cause any trouble, the art of exaggeration's easy to learn. You'll be slinging bullshit with the pros in no time.

Some people. Others are not so easily swayed.

I look forward to our lessons, Mr. Ginsberg.

Yeah, me too. I'll see you around.

Action / Accidental Video

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