anunluckypenny: [I cannot believe my eyes] (Believe there's good)
Penny ([personal profile] anunluckypenny) wrote in [community profile] poly_chromatic2014-02-28 09:06 pm


You know what it's like to feel like you've always been somewhere, even if you haven't? That's what I feel like. The City's felt like home since the first day, just about, and all of you are this giant extended family. What I'm getting at is that leaving is definitely not my favorite thing, which is so weird because I get to be alive and go wherever I want. That should basically trump everything else, right? But leaving means making a new home, and I like the one I've had here.

I remember coming here. It was January and I'd just died at home, so I looked like an extra in a horror movie. Steve Rogers, you were the first person I talked to, and you showed me to the Welcome Center. I might as well admit that I had a huge crush on you for... well, I still do, a little, but I'm really, really happy for you and Bucky. I met Wilson and Rosella and Curt and Lucy and Chase and Raikov, and you all remembered me from the last time I was here--or they remembered the other me that was here. Stephen and Euphie did, too. I don't know how that works, exactly. It was strange, and it only got stranger when Euphie told me that I started the Welcome Center. There was even a box of things I'd left behind. I still have all of it. It doesn't feel quite right, since I'm not sure that I'm the same Penny as the Penny they belonged to, but who lets a gorgeous violin go to waste?

That's something I plan on doing more in the future. Violin-playing. Painting, too. Things've been so busy that I forgot how to have hobbies there for a while.

What I really want to say is thank you. I freaked out a couple of times and there were always friends to talk me down or give me vegan comfort food or take me out to get my mind off of things. When I was lost in the City-Desert, Dean--not the one who's here now, the other one--came roaring in with that car of his and saved me from a two-headed worm thing, and when I was handcuffed to a drunk pervert--no offense to Peter, that's just the truth--a bunch of you convinced me not to do anything crazy like cut my hand off. When I thought I was back in high school, you guys were friendly even though I was more spastic than normal. That one time I thought I was a working lady at a saloon? Yeah. There are a lot of people I should thank for not taking me up on my business offers. I drank tea that turned me into a complete jerk and everyone forgave me. And then all of the times I've been totally overwhelmed by newcomers or visitors and didn't have enough people on board to help, it seemed like almost everyone was willing to lend a hand. And Yin? I don't think anyone's ever been as willing to help out as much as you. I really appreciate that.

And this last October... things were really bad there for a while. Thank you for sticking with me.

I want to say something to everyone I know, but then this would last forever and I might miss someone and that'd be awful, so I'm going to find everyone who's still here so I can tell you how great you are and how much I've liked getting to know--or re-know--you. Or you can come to me. Either way, try not to leave without saying goodbye? There're too many times in life when we don't get a chance to say goodbye. I don't want to waste this one.

Take care of yourselves (especially you, Jimmy). Never stop finding a reason to smile even when things get rough, and remember that everything happens. Good, bad--everything, and none of it lasts forever. So really enjoy the good things when you have them, and tell yourself that the bad things'll improve eventually. Don't be afraid to love, even when it hurts.

That's about all I know. If you're staying, I know things can only get better from here on out.

If you're leaving, be safe and be happy, wherever your door takes you.

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